IT’S one of those oddities of the post-colonial era that France still controls a vast portion of the Pacific Ocean covering 130 paradise-like islands - French Polynesia.  Although it’s a little strange in this day and age, presumably the arrangement has some benefits for the locals. Tourism is probably one of them. When we visited, French holidaymakers were there in large numbers, having found an idyllic spot as far away from home as it is possible to be, where the national anthem is ‘La Marseillaise’ and the Franc is still the legal currency (ten years after France dumped it). Japanese and American visitors were also numerous. Brits and Germans were almost nowhere to be seen.

We flew from Auckland to Papeete with our old friends, Air New Zealand. It’s a journey of around five hours, which is an easy ride in the company of ANZ, especially after they had already taken us from London to Hong Kong to Auckland. We were whisked straight to our hotel, the InterContinental Papeete, and didn’t get to see much of the Tahitian capital. This hotel is urgently in need of a revamp. The decor in the main building and restaurant looks like it belongs to the era of flared trousers. There is, however, a first rate French restaurant, if you care to walk to the far end of the hotel complex. It’s called Le Lotus, which has ‘an association’ with the 3-Michelin starred L’Auberge de l’Ill in France.

Air Tahiti

After a very short stay, we were back at Papeete airport in no time for our flight to Bora Bora, on an Air Tahiti ATR 72-500 (above). The national airline only has 12 planes which have to be able to land on 47 different islands and atolls across an area the size of Europe. Air Tahiti cheerfully devotes a whole page on its website to the issue of how difficult it can be to take off and land in some of these places:

In the atoll of Fakarava a lighthouse, disused but classified as a historical monument is placed right in line with the runway, to Cécile Ambrois’ regret as planes are hindered in their approach, a situation which imposes limits on passengers and freight allowed on board.

Thanks for sharing, Cecile!

Avoiding Fakarava, we set off for Bora Bora in the company of a bright-eyed Air Tahiti crew and a full load of passengers. Just a word on the ATR: it’s one of my least favourite aircraft. Along with the Beechcraft, it’s too big to have a fun turbo prop experience, but too small to offer any kind of comfort. This view was confirmed recently when I had to spend TWO HOURS on one of those things. More on that in later posts.

Thalasso Spa

Just what the hell is a ‘Thalasso Spa’ anyway? After a full week of staying in one, I’m none the wiser. But spending any time inside the ‘Spa’ bit of the InterContinental Resort etc, is a complete waste of time in this spectacular island paradise.

After being whisked by motor boat to the Resort, we soon found ourselves in our water villa (above), with a glorious view of Mount Otemanu (below).

Although Bora Bora was hot and sunny most of the time, the weather could turn violent quite quickly. In this picture, the clouds are gathering for a late afternoon thunderstorm, which happened on most of the days we were there. Our favourite part of the day was late at night, when the skies cleared and we could lie out on the lower deck with a glass of champagne and pick out the southern constellations above.

The experience

These chairs are empty because we spent almost no time in them! Who wants to be stuck on deck when you can be out swimming in the lagoon?

Once you’ve had enough of that, the Resort has plenty to keep guests occupied (I don’t want to use the word ‘activities’ because it sounds like Butlins or something). Here are our highlights:

Swimming with the sharks, stingrays and killer eels.

In the hands of three experienced divers, we headed out in a little boat to the deeper waters on the edge of the lagoon. First stop was to jump in the water with a bunch of black-tipped sharks (about a metre long) - to feed them! As we floated behind a single, flimsy rope, our divers handed out some bloody snacks to their sharp-toothed friends. The theory, of course, is that the sharks are far too interested in those to bother taking a bite out of an unappetising human, but that wasn’t comfort enough for one of our small party, who screamed and shot - arms flailing - back to the boat. The second part of the journey was probably riskier. We headed out to the coral where the Moray eels lived. As we dived into the deep water, these ten-foot monsters were asleep in the rock, but not for long as our divers bravely (recklessly) prodded them on the head and tried to tempt them out for a snack. Let me tell you: there is nothing uglier than the sight of a Moray eel’s wide open mouth. The final part of the trip was to much shallower waters, where the stingrays were gathered. All my silly fears about these delightful creatures evaporated as they swam around us and allowed themselves to be patted on the head (at least I think it was the head).

Jet skiing

It’s not exactly environmentally-friendly to go tearing around a Pacific island lagoon in a high-powered, gas-guzzling jet ski, but boy is it fun! I felt like some kind of James Bond villain as we followed our instructor at high speed all the way round InterContinental’s island.

Fine Dining

The main island of Bora Bora has one outstanding restaurant. It’s called Villa Mahana, a short drive from the jetty, where you can find cuisine from the top tables of France, using the best local fish and other ingredients.

The Verdict

Look at this view (above). There are few things finer in life than waking up in the middle of a lagoon amidst one of the world’s great beauty spots. Bora Bora is a whole day away from Europe, but only 12 hours from both Japan and California. As a result, there were many young Japanese couples not just on honeymoon here, but actually getting married (or repeating their vows) in the ‘Blue Lagoon Chapel’. Could there be any more romantic place to tie the knot? For the rest of us, it was just marvellous to spend time here while the rest of the world seemed to be falling apart.

How we got there

We flew on on Air New Zealand from Auckland to Papeete, then Air Tahiti to Bora Bora

Our ratings for Bora Bora

1-5 stars

Intercontinental Resort & Thalasso Spa

*****

Location

*****

Air Tahiti

**